51:32:35 l0:03:22

TGI Paul

Saturday, October 21, 2006

All Change At Hotel Hackney!

After dinner at Claridges, things got back on an even keel with Jay. He even moved out of the place he was still sharing with his ex (why didn't I spot these alarm bells?!) He moved in and we had a few great weeks, I loved having him here.

The rent money he gave me came in handy too of course! Since I've moved here I've realised I've over-committed myself financially and things have been tight. I hate being short of cash, it means you can't do the things you're mates are doing, and I worry myself sick when the direct debits start to bounce.

Anyway, we decided things were happening too quickly, so he moved in with a girlfriend. Then I started seeing him less and less. We argued a few times on the phone. A couple of weeks ago he announced that he may be off to San Francisco for a couple of weeks. Apparently his ex had bought the tickets when they were stll together, but he probably wouldn't. After all, he said, it may be awkward.

Now, SF is my favourite city in the world (as you'd know if you've seen any of my comments on Joe.My.God), and I couldn't quite get over the feeling of jealousy that he would be there and I would be here, commuting to Uxbridge on the Ghetto Express daily. (thats the Silverlink North London Line if any of you know it!)

Well, the next day I called and got no reply,nor the day after. I realised he'd gone. There had been no 'Goodbye'.

I knew the tickets he had were due to get him back to the UK on the 10th. I left it until the 12th to call. Again no reply.

Monday 16th; I had an e-mail at work. Sorry he hadn't been in touch, his phone was broken and he's waiting for a replacement. He'd had an 'OK' time, but nothing special. He'd like to meet up sometime. I said I was free most evenings this week. He was busy though, lots to catch up on since he's had two weeks off!

To my mind, if you care about someone at all, and you're aware they may be hurt by your actions, YOU BLOODY MAKE TIME!!

So, if he doesn't give a fuck, then frankly my dear, neither do I!

So now it's back to stage one, and another guy to add to the Roll Of (dis)Honour!

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